Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened. -Dr. Seuss
13/9/11
I went on to Twitter very early this morning and saw this quote, which was apt for where I am right now in my life.
A relationship I was in for 3 years, on and off, ended. I don’t intend to blame either him or me. I don’t do blame.
I own what I own and I take full responsibility for my part in the break-up.
There is no doubt in my heart that I love this man and always will. I love when he smiled, he showed his inner beauty, his humour is incredibly funny. He used to think I was funny, when I didn’t even realise it!
He is eclectic and so logical. Brilliant with computers too, from which I gained. I gained in many other ways too. He also has passion & loves bold. I do bold well!
We had great fun together.
It was a difficult relationship for both of us.
However, it is not that I wish to dwell upon. What I learned in this relationship, about me, will stand me in good stead for the rest of my life here on earth. I am deeply grateful for that, even though, it was one of the most painful lessons I have ever learned. He never set out to teach me this lesson, nor, I believe, did he know he would teach me this lesson, but he did.
I’ve just realised todays date! Today seventeen years ago, my marriage ended.I am so emotional right now! On this day 17 years ago, my ex-husband and I separated.
(Long pause here)
You know, I didn’t know then, that 17 years later I’d still be single! I am glad I didn’t! Truly.
It would have been too big to bear for me then.
My truth be told, I didn’t give another relationship much thought. In fact, it took me 5 years after my marriage break-up to go out with someone else. I felt too vulnerable. Even when I did get back into another relationship, the truth eventually came out, as it always does. He was in fact, married. But I didn’t know that, until, it was finished and then his wife phoned me! That will be a whole other chapter in itself in my autobiography!
One truth, that is my truth, is that when a relationship is very difficult, as my three relationships have been for me, it is important to listen & know it is time to honour self and move on. I am slow to listen to my inner voice! That inherent knowing wisdom, that I have yet to learn to trust fully.
Ironically and paradoxically, I am trained as a relation mentor. If there was anything more in my face, it is this moment, it is to believe my own inner voice! I need to have a healthier more loving relationship with Trich! Because, ALL relationships begin with self! That IS THE MOST IMPORTANT RELATIONSHIP, it is AS important as my spiritual relationship with GOD!We are all spiritual being too. God says in his commandments, LOVE GOD, YOUR NEIGHBOUR, AS YOURSELF!
Do you know, I didn’t set out to write about the fact that my marriage legally ended today 17 years ago, in my truth, it had ended long before that. I intended to pay tribute to my last love, but when a body sits down to write, expect the unexpected! I did not expect to write this.
Each love I’ve had, of which there were three, each taught me much about who I am. How our attraction, was, based upon our own unique pain bodies, which attracts like with like. Whose sole intention is to heal each one of us individually, if we allow the lesson to be positive, rather than negative. The most important blessing I have learned about love, is it is an energy and that energy does NOT die, even if we deny it. Love never dies. Love is the essence of GOD, GOD will never die, therefore, LOVE never dies. Unless of course, we choose perdition!
Choose wisely…………………………………… Love is forever, if you choose this path.
I dedicate this to the men I have loved and still love, always and forever.
Copy right protected.
This forms another chapter in my autobiography.